Grace was completely petrified of all characters in "costumes" (i.e. anyone whose face you couldn't see) --this included Minnie Mouse. She really
to not be afraid of her...she even waited in line to see her. But when it came our turn, she split. Abby, however, braved it out, and even asked Minnie to sign Grace's book. She thought that Minnie was pretty much awesome.
Then around 3pm, the drama of the trip began. Eliza, who'd been getting snottier and warmer and just overall miserable looking throughout the day woke up from her nap with a definite fever, goopy eyes and just looked awful. So, I sent Grace on this ride with our friends (again, thank heavens we were there with other people!!)
But, we had about an hour before our shuttle was going to arrive, so we went on a few more rides, met a few more characters...
Have you ever had an experience that makes such a good story when told out loud but is a flop when written? I fear that this might just be one of those stories. So just imagine you're here with me, and my Indian accent is top notch, and i'm animated as ever--and even still, you won't get the full effect of the awesomeness of this dude. He really did have the thickest accent in the world. It's only worth noting because it makes the story-telling that much better.
So, he arrives, complaining a bit about the traffic he had to fight to get there (which i'd assumed was rolled into his over-inflated price of $200...no?) But no biggie.
Then he attempted to exam Eliza. I've never seen anything like this. Now, granted, she's the most difficult child in the world with doctors (a nurse told me that, so it's a fact). But still, he shoved, and i mean shoved the otoscope in her ears. She was screaming, and I mean screaming bloody murder. But, at least he saw something, because, as he put it (with way too much enthusiasm, might i add) "she definitely has an ear infection!!"
I asked what he thought about her lungs and he said "oh, well, i can't really hear them because, you know, she is crying." So, in desperation I gave her a cookie to get her to pipe down, and after 15+ seconds of listening to her lungs with no screaming or crying, he said "well, i can't really say. I hear some wheezing, some crackling, but i can't say for sure. I don't think we need to worry about it."
hmmmm....
and THEN, he busts out his traveling pharmacy.
First he starts with the antibiotic. I'd assumed it'd be amoxicillin, but it wasn't. Which was fine. I know little about antibiotics, as this is only the third or fourth time i've needed them in the past 5 years. The kind he prescribed didn't have to be refrigerated and was only given once a day--both pluses for when you're on vacation. awesome. that's all i wanted.
Next he busted out another antibiotic--an injectable antibiotic. He spent 3 minutes telling me why Eliza needed that one, too. I kindly declined, as antibiotics are something I try to avoid pumping into my children in massive doses.
NEXT he busted out the "adult strength" nasal decongestant, and spent another 3 minutes telling me why she needed that. I kindly declined, again because of the whole no-pumping-unnecessary-drugs-into-my-children policy that i kinda have.
And then I asked how much that one cost.--it was $55.
The injectable one was $50
The one I got was $70.
His amoxicillin was $30 (anyone who's bought this knows that, WITHOUT insurance, this stuff costs $4)
and NEXT, he pulled out analgesic ear drops--$40
again, i declined. And honestly, it wasn't until about this point that I really realized what was going on. (Sure, it's easy for you, now that you're reading this to see that this dude was sketchy. But I had to figure it out as it was happening!! And it took me until this point!) Which is when i said "could i just get the names of those other prescriptions, just to run them by my Dr. tonight and see if she thinks I should get them?" In my mind i'm obviously thinking that I want my Dr. to confirm that this was total madness. But didn't matter, since he declined saying "well, since you're not going to buy them, let's just not worry about that."
and THEN i said, "you know, i think i could maybe get this azythromiacin for a little less at Walgreens, could I just get you to write a prescription for this?" To which he replied, "well, since I carry it with me, i cannot write a prescription."
Whoa.
What??
Seriously????
He then proceeded to direct me on how to use the antibiotic. "You'll give her 2.5 ml the first day, and then half of that, 1.75 ml the next 4 days."
Whoa
What??
Seriously??
How do you tell someone who went through that much school that his math is off? i wouldn't have bothered if I wasn't worried that a mis-dosage of his illegally imported, over-priced hokey drugs were going to extinguish my sweet daughter. So I picked up the syringe and said "oh, okay. so 2.5 the first day and then, wait, i think it'd be 1.25 the next, no?" He shamefully agreed and made the change on the paperwork. I felt kind of bad. but not really. more shocked. and scared.
And THEN he proceeded to give me all the info on how to make sure that my insurance company reimburses me for this visit. (Keep in mind, i'd discussed none of this with him, so this was just his normal schpeil), "In the letter be sure to say, 'there was no urgent care nearby, the ER had a wait of 6+ hours, I did not have a car" which is when I softly butted in and said, "Yeah, we actually don't have a car, which is why this house-call was so appealing." To which he replied, "Oh, well then that one is true! Be sure to emphasize that!"
Seriously.
So, after paying the guy, signing some form that probably discloses that he's not actually a Dr. and thanking him for his time, he went on his way. And I immediately called my pediatrician. There was no way in H-E- double hell that I was going to give that stuff to Eliza before getting a second opinion. Since Kaiser sucks and it takes 10 hours for them to get back to me, I called one of my life-long bf's who happens to be married to a pediatrician--and he okayed the dosage, assured me that that Dr. was sketchy as all get out, and told me that even so, Eliza's not going to implode if I give her this stuff. Zak, if you're reading this--THANK YOU!!!
So, long story short, the antibiotics did their job, her fever was gone less than 24 hours later, she slept much better the rest of the trip, and I learned a priceless lesson: even probable ex-cons with stolen 'scripts from Walmart and Mexico can buy a stethoscope from Goodwill and sell you drugs that will ultimately clear up your child's infection making the rest of your vacation oh-so-much more pleasant....oh, and that I should have married a pediatrician.
And that was day 2 at Disneyland.
Days 3 and 4 are going to be seem very boring when compared to this....
4 comments:
Woooooow. Wow.
I want to know if you complained to the hotel? They are risking some seeerious lawsuits, in my opinion (and perhaps Reid's?).
Insane. I think I might have lost it.
I love that Eliza was so attached to Minnie! I'm glad the girls loved everything :) And that "doctor" story is hilarious and frightning, wierd. :)
Seriously - how could the hotel recommend someone like that? I'd be sure to file a formal complaint.
PS- married a PA - you can ALWAYS give me a call if you want to ask questions. He'd have told you not to bother because antibiotics have not been proven to clear up ear infections. They usually go away in the same amount of time and regardless of what you give them. Still, glad Eliza was feeling better so soon! Its so hard to have them feeling miserable.
I want to hear more about what you loved at Disneyland! I grew up down there so I've been more times than I can count. I can't imagine what it would be like to go there for the first time!
HAHAHA. Yes, we have had multiple encounters with Urgent Care and hotel docs. I swear they print up their medical degrees off the computer. You probably wouldn't had any better luck with urgent care. We call them the "doc in a box."
I went to one urgent care doc, told him I was allergic to cephelexion and he proceeds to give me a perscription for Keflex (the generic for cephelexion) just minutes later.
I think the qualification for being a doc at one of those places is RETARD.
I do have to say - Rosephin shots which they give at urgent care works amazing wonders in making one feel better (according to my husband who has received it many a time). I'm not sure how safe they are for children... and I surely wouldn't have trusted it from the wacko man.
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